What do you do when it hurts? (5/5/09)

Rub some 'tussin on it!

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i take a picture. it lasts longer, but it makes it all go away so fast.

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I cry. Not always right away, but sooner or later it happens.

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Spray Windex on it.

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cry like there is no tomorrow.........

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ice

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Prop it up on the sofa and begin self-medication...

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Cry, cry, cry.

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I read. What do I read when it hurts?

It depends on how I hurt. if it is a kind of hurt that I am so hurt that all I want to do is escape, I read escapist fiction, anything from Octavia Butler to Ian Rankin to The Count of Monte Cristo, hopefully something I haven't read before or at least something I haven't read in twenty years.

Then, once I can deal a little bit better, my choices get stronger and I read Tolstoy, Turgenev, Virginia Woolf, others.

If I have the kind of hurt that stems from loneliness or a sense of really being singular, I read Beckett, Shakespeare, Sarah Kane, Thuycydides, Diderot, Swift, poetry like Ginzberg, or any of a short list of others who can make me feel like the kind of understanding I need is not a dream.

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cry, or scream, or both

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I cry, get angry and if it persists I feel sorry for myself.

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Physical or emotional hurt? The answer is pretty much the same - I have had a chronic illness for many years and have developed a lot of coping strategies for physical pain that work for emotional pain as well. One is that I try to relax and take a mental trip to somewhere that I really, really love. I imagine walking through that place, and try to bring back in every detail the sights, the sounds, the smells, who I was with, what I ate and drank, what the weather was like, was there art that I loved? Plants, flowers? What clothing was I wearing and how did it feel on my body? Was the wind blowing? I go very slowly and imagine everything in as much detail as I can. I have a whole list of places that I go - Delft, Chinatown in New York, Boston's North End, the Arnold Arboretum, the Charles Bridge in Prague, New Orleans, Memphis, Santa Fe.... After a mental getaway I always feel the pain cycle has been broken.

Also- listening to music. Really listening, focusing on the bass lines, the drumming, not just the singer and guitarist. Putting on head phones and following every note. You would think I'd pick some cheesy meditation music for this, but I actually find it works best with old school punk. If the music is too relaxing it's too easy to drift off and think about the pain again. It has to be something that will totally take over the brain functions. How do I spell relief? S-T-I-V B-A-T-O-R-S.

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The only thing I can do: dance it out.

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Fully feel it and apply whatever practices I know.

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Get another tattoo

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Whatever I can to make it stop. Easier to do with physical pain, much
harder with pain in the heart. I usually think my way through
heartache, but it takes a long time.

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Nothing, unless it is physically diabillitating, in which case I get meds from the MD. Living is a constant state of atomic collision, one pain after another, physically, mentally, spiritually. Most of the time you just have to let it flow through you, being transparent to the experience. Perseverance furthers.

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Kiss it and make it better.

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some times the right thing and some times I smoke

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Stretch and rest, or take a small break

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I take one Tylenol and two Advil (someone told me this is like taking Tylenole with Coedine but without the woozy head effects). That's for physical hurts. For emotional hurts - chocolate!

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moan.

pray.

moan.

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to feel better

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I used to pick up the phone and reach out. but I find my friends are busy, occupied with their own lives, relationships, and problems. Besides, I find it takes too much energy to explain it all. I can always hear the other person typing on the other end of the phone anyway. Now I find myself more likely to reach for a Klonopin, ice crea, = and putting in a dvd.

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kiss it and make it better

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Try to make "it" stop if whatever is causing the pain is injurious to body or spirit..so if I have to speak up, I find my voice.

Sometime when it hurts, it's an unused muscle (or emotion or truth) that needs to be worked a little harder or longer, so I ease up put keep moving forward. Exhaustion and dehydration can make the last 1/4 of a long hike or mountain bike ride really really unpleasant. So...I drink more (Gatorade!!) and I get my brain to shift out of "OMG, how much longer, farther is it" to a more positive frame.
Advice given a friend a few days ago by her best male friend: Life is rough. Wear a helmet.

I spend a good deal of my life wearing a helmet...skiing, biking, even considering one for surfing/windsurfing (the way ugliest helmets of all time). Maybe I have it all wrong. Where I really get hurt is my personal and professional interactions. Maybe I should put on a helmet first thing every morning to help ward off the angry stoning mobs of haters!!

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Well, it has hurt an awful lot the past couple of weeks and for damn good reason. I've prayed and meditated and called the ones who love me and had smart feet and all that good kind of stuff. I also ate too much bread and pizza, listened to a lot of sports talk radio, and made out with someone whom I probably should not have made out with. That kind of thing.

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I sulk, I cry, I isolate, I plot revenge, I pray.